Coffee Probs: Bandana Kid Answers


Bandana Kid

I don’t have enough time to get coffee in the morning because the line at Dunks is too long and I wake up too late. But then I fall asleep in class. Help BANDANA KID


First of all, same.  Same.  I think we should bring back the whole “coffee sold at cafeteria” thing, but I’m not exactly privy as to why it stopped in the first place.  I would recommend making some at home and bringing it in a to-go mug, but I know how hard that can be to pull off if you’re strapped for time.  Preparing things in advance is a pain, and plus you have to remember it, which we all know is just too much work.  Personally, I take to the whole grazing style of eating.  I’ll bring snacks to munch on throughout the day that may have some caffeine in them or give me enough of an incentive to get through to the end of the day so I can go home and eat cookies or something.  Of course, you’re not supposed to eat in class, you bad student you, but it’s not a big deal as long as you’re not making a mess and destroying people with food allergies.  With the snack time rule, there’s technically nothing stopping kids from eating in the classroom—it’s class time when the faculty don’t want you eating (most of them, there are always exceptions.)  I bring oyster crackers literally everywhere because they’re easy to eat, a good energy boost, and I can grab a couple to munch on before class starts.  Hope this helps you out somewhat.  Life’s tough.


What is the best way to get away with bringing a coffee to school (mainly in the math wing)? Any insider tips?


Like any good getaway plan, you need to stay confident when confronted.  My advice is to get those spill-proof cups.  If the teacher is just worried about spills, you can let them know it won’t be a problem.  If the teacher tells you that coffee is a “distraction” to their class, be prepared to explain how research shows that teenagers aren’t really functioning until around 10AM (you’re gonna need sources for that, don’t quote me) and that you’d rather be active and awake for their delightful lesson.  Bonus points if you can sound sincere and less sassy.  If you’re not one of those people who can handle the “talking to teachers” thing, get a cup that isn’t see-through.  Take your beverage in a mug from home.  If they’re going to call you out for it, might as well take down everyone else who had the same idea with you.  In other words, if it’s a personal mug that’s not clear, you can then tell them that if they’re banning coffee they can check your mug and everyone else’s.  I don’t believe that any teacher will really want to take away your coffee or subsequently check everyone’s coffee mugs.  I’d be careful with this approach, since it takes some guts and involves a lot of risk: you could upset the teacher and get in more trouble than you would just having brought coffee in.  There’s no need to be a jerk, but there is a reason for you to stand up for yourself.  We’re high schoolers, not preschoolers who need to have our apple juice distributed in dixie cups at snack time and be told that we need a teacher to guide us to the bathroom (I’ll admit though, I welcome free juice).


Stay awake, kids.

Bandana Kid


Send in a question!  Asks are anonymous: